Unplugged
I spent a big part of the last ten days unplugged – no phone calls, no cell phone possible, no internet, no email, no local or national news. The classic thing is to say I loved it, and it was wonderful. That’s a lie. Being unplugged is very unsettling, at least for me. I had no idea if my kids were OK, if our pets were safe, if my house was still standing, or if the country was in turmoil. Being unplugged from stuff you DON’T like is great, but when it comes to the stuff you DO care about, it’s hard on the mind and soul. Being unplugged, though, sure didn’t keep me from having a great time.

Manly men
I have no patience for men in their 40s – 70s who “don’t go to no hospitals, and don’t trust none of them doctors.” Maybe that’s why you’re dying now, huh buddy? These morons wouldn’t miss an oil change on their 4x4s, and probably tune up their own lawn mowers, but preventive maintenance on the most intricate machine they have (their body)? Of course not! I don’t say it, but I’m thinking “Nobody drug you in here this time either, buddy – go ask your buddies at the bar about your chest pain, and bleeding from your ears!” I mean, really!

Lists
All of us have at least a touch of OCD. Mine is manifested by lists – I love making them, following them, and marking them off as I go. Without a list, I’m listless (pun intended) and anxious. How will I know if I’ve forgotten something, without a list? If I have the day off tomorrow, I’ll sleep better tonight if I have a list waiting for me in the morning. Even if the list is nothing but: 1) relax, and 2) write, it helps –a reminder when I wake up that there are no pressing events first thing makes me happy. My happy light goes on when I am able to flip a completed list into the trash. I’m not manic about this, of course. With only one or two items, I won’t start a list. Once I have three, though, life gets sweeter. I have my list.

Toys
Women love shoes, my woman tells me, because they always fit. No matter how much weight you gain or lose, your shoes always look good. Guys don’t care as much about clothes and shoes. We can go through the Taco Bell drive-through wearing just our underpants, and feel comfortable doing it. For guys, it’s the toys. Here’s my top ten toys, in increasing order of how happy they make me: 10) cell phone, 9) air compressor, 8) GPS, 7) all my cameras, 6) my TV/DVR/CD/DVD system, 5) kitchen aid knife set and stand mixer, 4) giant bicycle, 3) Honda Fit, 2) ASUS netbook, and 1) the big computer. I could Amish, if it wasn’t for all my toys.